One of the perks of my job is I get to meet incredible families almost daily.  I get to observe parents who have been successful raising happy and confident adults.  I thought I would share a quick story from an encounter with a father from 2010.  

We were in Memphis, Tennessee playing at Rhodes College.  There was a game prior to ours that I wanted to scout.  All we had was our charter bus so I needed a ride.  Larry Gasser, who’s son Brian was a pitcher on our team, offered to drive me.  

I knew Mr. Gasser but not well.  It can be a nightmare for a coach to be in this situation.  Unfortunately, you never know if there is an agenda.  

Brian bounced between our number one or two pitcher his freshmen year; however, he opened up the 2010 team as our number three.  In essence, he had been demoted to start the season.  To be honest, I was hesitant to be “trapped” in a car with Mr. Gasser.  

Did he have an axe to grind?  Was I going to get bombarded with questions?  Would it be a 20-30 minute interrogation?  

The ride I dreaded led to an amazing conversation.  I was a new father.  We talked about raising children.  We talked about being a good husband.  We talked about making a difference.  Not one time did we discuss the baseball team or his son’s role.  It was incredible.

There is one pearl of wisdom that Larry shared that I wanted to pass along to you.  I asked him, “Do you get nervous when Brian pitches?”  His response was priceless and I share this often with parents.  

“Coach, I realized a long time ago that Brian is a good boy before the game, and Brian is a good boy after the game.  I just enjoy watching him during the game.”

Make it a great week,

Mike

P.S. It worked out pretty well Brian.  He became the National Pitcher of the year in 2011.  He was also a part of two National Championship teams.  

CBS football analyst, Tony Romo, is a football savant. It’s like he’s watching a replay of the game and the viewers are seeing it for the first time.  His predictions are never wrong. That is, until last Sunday.

The Kansas City Chiefs were holding a 5-point lead over the Cleveland Browns.  Their star quarterback, Patrick Mahomes, was sidelined after sustaining a concussion.  The momentum was in the Browns favor.  Facing a 4th and inches with 1:15 remaining the Chiefs head coach, Andy Reid, had a choice:

  • Punt and force the Browns to drive the length of the field with no timeouts…or
  • Go for the first down and try to win the game. 

Reid sent his offense onto the field. In the booth, Romo explained how the Chiefs were going to create motion and try to draw the Browns offside. He commented on how they wouldn’t run a play-they would likely take a timeout and punt. In the middle of his sentence, the Chiefs did the unthinkable…..they snapped the ball.  Journeyman quarterback, Chad Henne, threw a short pass for the first down.  The shocking call solidified the win.  

If Reid would have chosen to punt, no one would have criticized.  The Browns would have gained possession with poor field position, no timeouts and roughly a minute to play.  The safe play was to punt. 

In fairness, the game of football has embraced analytics more recently.  The numbers frequently show the team should go for it on 4th and short and not punt.  However, I still don’t know many, if any, coaches who would have went for it in this situation; let alone with their backup QB throwing a pass!

How did Kansas City Chief Head Coach make the decision to pass on 4th and inches with the game on the line?  What allows someone to make a call that goes against popular opinion? 

I’d love to take Andy Reid to lunch and ask him about his decision.  I refuse to believe it’s as simple as him being a riverboat gambler.  I also don’t believe it was him relying on straight data and analytics.  I believe it’s deeper than that. 

For what it’s worth, I believe it came down to the capital he’s built.  He has been a head coach for 22 years.  In his 8 years with the Chiefs, he has a .711 winning percentage including winning the Super Bowl last season.  To put that in perspective, the coach often regarded as the best ever, Bill Belichick, has a winning percentage only slightly better with the New England Patriots (.726).

Longevity alone, however, doesn’t buy you capital. It was clear in the post-game interviews how much the players believed in their coach and each other.  Decisions, as it turns out, have a much greater chance of success if the ones executing believe in the plan.  There is also the capital with the front office and ownership.  It’s not simply their words.  There’s a feeling when you know you are fully supported from those above you.  Recency effect also plays a part; winning the Super Bowl last year helps. The fans and media are more lenient with a recent winner. 

What can we learn from this? First, how can a leader expedite the process of gaining capital? It’s critical to identify the key stakeholders and begin intentionally building trust.  Every behavior is either deposit or withdrawal.. 

Second, if we are in management or the front office, how can we provide the support to allow our leaders to make real-time, bold decisions.  In other words, is there a way to empower boldness from a leader who’s lacking the pedigree?  I’m convinced, a rookie head coach could not have made this controversial decision.

Making decisions is a requirement for leaders. Do we want leaders to go rogue, dismiss data, and always “go with their gut?” Of course not.  Do we want them to always play the percentages knowing over time the odds win?  Heck no. Do we make the call based off optics alone? I don’t think so. 

We can never forget that sports and business are “played” by real people.  People are messy.  Life is messy.  Situations are complex. 

Feel is real.  Call it what you want: gut instinct; intuition. I call it information that can’t be quantified.  Things such as the look in the collective defense’s eyes saying, “we can’t stop this team.” A few guys who are hurt or injured. Knowing the tendency of the officiating crew to call pass interference.  Just because it is hard or impossible to measure doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. 

One final thing, once we’ve built up the capital we must display the courage to use it.  We won’t have the capital forever.  For example, if Henne’s pass would have fallen incomplete, Reid’s capital would have suffered.  The media would have crushed him, some players would have questioned the call, and I’m sure he would have received feedback from the front office.  Things would have been different next year.

I guess the bottom line is this: you need the support of everyone involved to make your best decisions. In order to gain this trust, there must be a track-record of positive interactions and outcomes.  And, once that capital is earned it’s having the courage to shoot your shot!!

Andy Reid did, so can you and I.

I’ve watched the clip of this play 100 times. At first, I thought they caught the Browns off guard.  They really didn’t.  It wasn’t like Tyreek Hill was standing wide open.  He had to beat his man and Henne had to trust the route. They executed the play.  My fascination stems from how easily that play could have not worked. How easily the Browns could have taken over possession at midfield.  How harshly this decision would have been criticized.

How did the Miami Heat reach the NBA finals?  They entered as the 5th seed in the Eastern Conference. The playoffs began with them handling the Indiana pacers (4-0), then slaying the #1 Milwaukee Bucks (4-1), before defeating the Boston Celtics (4-2). The person who has been given major credit for their success is someone who was previously seen as a clubhouse cancer, Jimmy Butler. 

Over his NBA career, Butler developed a reputation as a bad teammate.  He entered the league with the Chicago Bulls in 2011, but it wasn’t a fit.  He clashed with teammates and fought with the coaches.  Next, he landed in Minnesota with young stars Andrew Wiggins and Karl Anthony Towns.  Butler’s intense work ethic and fierce desire to win were met with resistance.  There is a legendary story from this time when Butler took a group of reserve players and DUSTED the starters in a scrimmage.  In the process he called out the entire organization, aggressively shouting at the GM that they needed him to win.  Not long after he was traded to Philadelphia where things once again failed to work out.

Here’s where the story takes a turn.  During his time with the Bulls, Butler got close to former Miami Heat icon, Dwyane Wade.  Wade’s time in Chicago was not good either. Like Butler, he clashed with the organization. When Wade went back to Miami, he told the front office they had to get Jimmy Butler; that he was their type of guy. Several years later, after a meeting with President Pat Riley and Head Coach Erik Spoelstra, Butler jumped at the chance to join the Heat. 

With Butler leading the way, the Heat are now competing in the NBA finals against the LA Lakers. 

Three Questions:
This story has my mind racing. Here are three questions to ponder regardless of your business:

  1. Who is the problem? Butler was seen as a bad teammate.  He couldn’t get along with players, coaches or the front office.  Could it be that those organizations were not focused on the right things?  Is it possible that they valued talent (like Wiggins and Townsend) over championship behaviors? We often write people off as being too brash, opinionated, or selfish.  Would it be in our best interest to listen to these difficult people?  To provide the space to express their frustrations.  It takes courage to listen, to REALLY listen,  because we may hear uncomfortable things. Have you ever felt like you weren’t being heard?  It’s extremely frustrating.  As leaders we must ask ourselves: “Who is the problem?”
  1. Is the culture strong enough to handle an outlier? The Heat have a clearly defined culture based on hard work, competing and winning.  Pat Riley has a long history of success.  This type of stability and awareness allows them to take calculated risks on players that others may be leery of.  Jimmy Butler, or anyone for that matter, isn’t bigger than the organization. Do you believe in your culture?  Is your culture strong enough to take a shot on a high leverage person that others fear?  It’s ok to say, “no, we aren’t ready for that, yet.” It’s actually admirable.  Cultures like the Heat, Spurs, Patriots, Steelers, Cardinals, and others are equipped for the risk.  But many are not. 
  1. What if it’s a bad fit?  The story of former NBA star, Dennis Rodman, is compelling.  Rodman was a fit for the “Bad Boy” Pistons during their championship runs.  He was then dealt to San Antonio Spurs where his eccentric style wasn’t embraced.  Eventually he landed in Chicago where the coach (Phil Jackson) and leaders (Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippen) decided his skill-set was necessary for them to win championships.  The documentary, “The Last Dance,” does an amazing job recounting the Bulls internal struggle with Rodman’s antics.Were the Spurs wrong for letting Rodman go? No. Were the Bulls wrong for comprising some of their values to accommodate him? No. Fit is everything. Knowing the people and values of the organization are critical to long-term success. The Bulls won multiple championships with Rodman. The Spurs shine came later when they hired Greg Popovich and went on to win five championships. Their journey was a slower play. How well do you know your organization?  Are you ok with someone leaving and flourishing in another role? 

Final Thoughts:
The Jimmy Butler odyssey challenged me to reflect. I’m reminded that some of my all-time favorite kids entered with a checkered past. “Be careful, he can rub his teammates wrong.” “He’s not coachable.” Sometimes a new culture can make the difference. 

On the other hand, many athletes have left our program and flourished in other environments. Our program didn’t bring out that person’s best.

Butler went from being seen as a cancer, a horrible teammate, to an exemplary leader. “As I’ve said time and time again and Spo constantly says, ‘We’re not for everybody.’ I’m not for everybody. But, here I am. The guys we have, we’re (perfect) for one another. We’re going to constantly compete for one another.  This is home for me.” 

One person’s trash is another person’s treasure. 

Years ago, I was a solid racquetball player. One of our other assistant coaches, Sam Mann, began playing.  Sam was a strong athlete, fresh out of playing professional baseball.  We’d compete, and I would beat him soundly.  He caught the racquetball bug and started playing frequently.  It went from easy wins to us playing close matches.  Soon he would have me down big, but the old veteran would sneak out a win.  He was frustrated. I knew, however, my winning days were numbered. 

Eventually, he beat me.  Here’s the crazy thing: we probably played 10-15 times after that.  I never won again.  He got over the hump and never looked back. 

Last week, I was reminded of this story watching the Cleveland Browns beat the Pittsburgh Steelers.  Entering their two most recent matchups, the Browns were 7-42-1 since 1994 against their rivals.

The Browns, in my opinion, have possessed the better roster for a few years. Despite their talent, they still struggled to overcome the Steelers.  Things looked bleak again this year. In the October matchup, they were embarrassed 38-7. 

Over the course of the season the Browns continued to improve.  Entering the regular season finale, they needed to beat the Steelers in order to qualify for their first playoff game in 18 years.  The Steelers had already secured a playoff appearance- the game would not affect their situation.  With this information in mind, the Steelers decided to rest several of their key players. 

The Browns narrowly won the game versus what many skeptics called the “Steeler’s JV Team,” 28-24.  The win put the Browns in the playoffs. Even more interesting, it set up another matchup with the Steelers. 

Despite several players being injured and their Head Coach, Kevin Stefanski, unavailable  because of COVID-19- the Browns won the playoff game in a convincing fashion.  

They finally overcame their nemesis. 

Reflection Opportunity

There are two lessons to consider from these stories: 

Lesson 1: Stay on the Gas.  Winning is a habit; so is losing.  Acquiring the talent and resources is the easy part. Overcoming the mental hurdle is the major obstacle.  “Mind control” over your opponent is hard earned.  It’s important to do whatever is possible (within the rules of course) to keep the edge.  The Steelers made the choice to rest starters; a sound decision on the surface.  Could that decision, however, have given the Browns a slight mental edge?

Lesson 2: Keep Knocking. The path to greatness is rarely a linear process.  To overcome the inevitable setbacks, resilience is necessary. It’s important to keep showing up and chipping away. Sometimes it feels impossible. It’s not.  It does take grit and perseverance to achieve meaningful goals. So often teams, organizations, and individuals quit right before their breakthrough.    

Final Thought:

I encourage you to keep charging forward.  If you have an edge, fight to keep it.  If you are chasing, keep pounding the rock. Your big victory is right around the corner!

The COVID-19  situation threw us a curveball.  Life’s typical fast pace has been disrupted for many.  Over the last two months I’ve had a wide range of conversations- from our student-athletes to experts in various fields.  Incredibly, or maybe not so incredibly, people are experiencing similar pain points.  Below are some common words and phrases that have been used to capture the challenges we are facing.  In addition, I share my thoughts- after the numerous conversations- on how to cope and even thrive during this pandemic. 
 
Struggle #1 Uncertainty:
Will schools open in the fall? Am I going to be employed at the end of the month? When will I be able to see my friends, kids, or grandchildren again? Will sports return?  Will life ever be normal? 
 
Positive Thought:
The present challenge is to accept the uncertainty.  Spending too much time thinking about the future is dangerous; spending too much time revisiting the past is equally damaging.  My conversations have led me to double down on present moment focus. In addition, the sports saying of “control what you can control” has never been more relevant. Making a list of the things we still have control over can be beneficial. 
 
Struggle #2 Guilt:
Is it ok to enjoy this time? While this is an extremely difficult time with loss of life, jobs, and businesses suffering- many people have mentioned they’ve enjoyed certain aspects.  This has led to powerful feelings of guilt. 
 
Positive Thought:
Enjoying parts of this time and also being compassionate to the situation are not mutually exclusive.  Self-compassion is necessary.  It’s ok to have mixed feelings; it’s part of being human.  This doesn’t have to be an “either/or” situation.  It is possible to have compassion and empathy to the struggle while also finding joy in other areas.  Those feelings are normal and healthy. 
 
Struggle #3 Loss of Structure:
The heavily structured and programmed lives of many have been replaced with time and flexibility.  Several conversations stemmed around having the ability to delay work in the present because procrastination was an option.  “I’ll just do it later” has become a popular mantra. 

Positive Thought:
Self-discipline is necessary. Freedom is powerful- embrace it.  This is a great time to do inventory on what’s really important.  Blocking of larger segments of time, (1-3 hours) for critical work is a highly effective approach. 

Struggle #4 Improvement with Constraints:
“Failing to prepare now will cost you in the future.”  This is a common phrase used by coaches and leaders to encourage action during this time.  While the intention is fine, it has created anxiety in some: “how can I get better when I have limited resources?” Athletes are struggling to improve without access to gyms, facilities and coaches. “How can I put in a full day of work when all the kids are home and require attention?” These constraints are real.
 
Positive Thought:
First, forgive yourself.  It’s tough to learn in stressful environments.  If you are becoming a better daughter, son, mother, father, and friend during this time you are winning.  In addition, focus on resourcefulness not resources. Hill sprints are a great way to improve speed and power- you don’t need a gym for that. YouTube is a great resource for “how to” videos.  Books, articles, and podcast are still great sources of knowledge.  When the time is right for you, there are countless ways to improve.
 
Struggle #5 Connection:
Social distancing has created a void in physical human connection.  Face to face conversations, social dinners, parties, practices, spiritual gatherings  and competitions are currently obsolete.  The energy of human interaction is impossible to replace.  Our days are now filled with Google Meets, Zoom calls, and other virtual interactions. 
 
Positive Thought:
Technology has served us well during these tough times.  I’ve had more than a few people mention how they have connected with friends and families more in the last few months than they had in years.  Virtual happy hours and other get-togethers have helped reunite.  Also, people are reporting deeper relationships with their immediate family during the pandemic; family dinners and game nights have been re-engaged.  Keep searching for ways to connect. 
 
Conclusion:
I’d be remiss if I didn’t thank all of the folks on the frontlines who are sacrificing daily.  In addition, I’m thankful for decision makers who are wrestling with health issues, the economy and various other considerations.  Political and business leaders are faced with really tough decisions. I hope we can all show compassion, kindness, empathy and come together during this difficult time. 
 
Make it a great week,
 
Mike
 
Have you experienced any of these struggles?  Would you add any other challenges to the list? 
 

Recently, I attended a workshop on Servant Leadership hosted by Paul Scanlon.  Besides being the best orator I’ve witnessed, Paul’s content was phenomenal. He took shots at nearly every profession represented in the room: bankers, politicians, educators and clergy members.  However, he walked the fine line of honesty and candor without making it personal. 

Paul was on the topic of building committed teams when he dropped the nugget of the night.  He asked, “how do you build loyalty within your team?” I was on the edge of my seat waiting for a long answer.  He responded with, “Ask someone, ‘How’s your momma doing’?” 

His statement sent me back nearly a decade ago when I was on a job interview.  Somehow the topic of my parents came up and I mentioned my father was deceased.  The interviewer sat back and with a welcoming smile said, “Tell me about your dad.”

Despite the job having many problems and clearly not a fit for me, I almost took the position.  Why? Because I felt a tremendous connection with the person interviewing. Her willingness to break the pattern of a typical interview, take a risk, and connect was powerful.

Our world is moving fast.  Automation, science and data have changed the landscape of nearly every business.  While information is being exchanged at warp speed it’s important to remember that humans need connection. 

I believe the organizations that can maintain the human touch will be ones that thrive in the years to come.  Sure, advancement in technology is important, but nothing can motivate, inspire, and create loyalty like a warm smile, a friendly pat on the back, or an inquisitive question. 

Paul challenged the audience, “lift your chin and realize there is a human on the other side.”  I challenge you to do the same this week. Let’s put the devices down and sit across from someone we care about and ask with genuine curiosity, “How’s your momma doing?” 

 (This article was orginally posted on July 6, 2020)

What an interesting time!  There are high levels of fear, anxiety, distrust, and skepticism. People are worried about the future.

  • Are we going to face another shut down?
  • Will schools reopen in the fall? 
  • What will happen if I lose my job? 
  • Will professional sports ever be the same?

In the recent months, I’ve witnessed people obsessing about things they have little or no control over. I’ve been guilty of this.  While watching a 10u baseball game I was reminded of an important lesson: control the controllable.    

Lessons from the Sandlot:
There are several ways to describe the first year of kid pitch baseball- slow, agonizing, boring- to name a few.  What I’ve noticed is the extreme emotional output on the child who is pitching.  They are an emotional wreck!  Most of them don’t understand that several factors are outside of their control.. 

  • If the batter chooses to swing.
  • If the batter crushes a home run.
  • If the umpire calls the pitch a ball or strike.
  • If the fielder catches the baseball. 
  • If your coach, mom, or dad yells at you. 

At the 10u level, the vast majority of kids can’t comprehend this.  They feel like everything is their fault.  They don’t understand that an error was made behind them or that the umpire missed a call.  They just know there was a poor outcome, and they assume they are to blame.

Over the years, the pitcher eventually realizes that after releasing the pitch the outcome is largely out of his control.  This isn’t to avoid blame or criticism.  In fact, it’s just the opposite.  The result provides information to be analyzed and used for future decision making.  The advanced pitcher focuses on the process and avoids the emotional rollercoaster of letting results define their success. 

My son is ten and is going through this journey.  I’m not sure how much he understands but here’s what I encourage him to focus on. 

  • Play catch with someone a few days a week.
  • Be ready to field his position.
  • Back up bases.
  • Communicate and be a positive teammate.
  • After a play, understand the current situation and decide what needs to be done next.
  • Display the courage to keep trying.

That’s it.  Those are things he can control.  It’s a much simpler game.

Athletes frequently get lost in the future.  What bad things are going  to happen next?  How many runs are they going to score? How are my coaches/parents going to react? 

Those questions are common.  Those questions also let us know that uncertainty is winning.  Those questions lead to negative results. 

Sports Life Parallel:
The parallels between sports and life always amaze me.  In looking at my son’s list I thought, “That’s the blueprint for how I need to approach life right now.”

  • “Play catch”- Do the work.
  • “Field your position”- Add value.
  • “Back up bases”- Support others.
  • “Communicate and be a great teammate”- Focus on relationships.
  • “Analyze the play”- Be adaptable.
  • “Display courage”- Keep going. 

Conclusion:
Why would I think about missing a shot that I haven’t taken”- Michael Jordan

We are in the midst of tough and challenging times.  In my lifetime, I have not experienced mass uncertainty like we are presently witnessing.  Like the great Jordan said, we can’t be worried about problems that haven’t arrived. 

This time demands that we focus on what we control.  That list is longer than we often acknowledge. 

As we charge on to the field following halftime of the year 2020, we are faced with an uncertain future.  People will resort to gossip and fighting on what they believe should be done.  Others will choose to spend time consuming an unhealthy amount of news increasing their worry and anxiety. 

Let’s not fall for these traps.  Let’s focus on relationships, health, growth, and happiness.  Let’s be mindful of the content we consume.  Let’s guard against people who want to bask in negativity.  Let’s adapt and persevere.  Let’s be quick to lend a helping hand. 

The world needs you right now,

Mike

Recently, the universe has been attempting to get my attention. On three separate occasions I listened to experts in different fields discuss how they handle problems.  While most people avoid conflict, these people recommended running toward issues:

  • Comedian Jerry Seinfeld was on the Tim Ferris Podcast. During the conversation he mentioned how he never lets an issue fester. Instead, when he feels tension he immediately confronts. “I don’t like discourse and I am fearless in rooting it out and solving it. And if anyone is having a problem I’m going to walk right up to them and go, ‘Is there a problem? Let’s talk about this.’ Because I cannot stand this type of turmoil.” (Here’s a link to the entire thought provoking interview: Seinfeld/Ferris).
  • During a virtual professional development event, I heard Piers Thynee and Mark Mathieson of McClaren Group discuss the fast paced world of Formula 1 racing. Their team was charged with increasing ventilation production from 50 a week to 200 a day in response to the pandemic. Needless to say, inevitable obstacles appeared. They credited moving toward the problems, instead of hiding, as a key to their successful execution.
  • Current New Jersey Nets General Manager, Sean Marks, spent several years with the highly respected San Antonio Spurs. He noticed head coach Gregg Popovich was eager to engage in difficult conversations. “Pop would never shy away from a challenging conversation. He actually relished them.”

What can leaders do?

It is much easier to spot problems than it is to find solutions. Elite leaders ask themselves: “How can I improve the situation?” 

Most people hide from problems because they don’t want to disappoint someone they care about: parent, coach, boss, spouse, etc. The fear of letting others down is hard to handle.

What if we decided to create an environment that leaned into problems? What if we stated upfront: “there are going to be issues? Big issues. We expect and even welcome those challenges”

Would this approach empower others to move toward, instead of away, from issues?

It’s important to reflect on how we are reacting to bad news. When someone presents us with an issue, how do we respond? Huffing and puffing? Throwing our head on the desk? Or is it more subtle like bad body language, or a short cunning response?

Are we creating the psychological safety required for growth and improvement?

Man in the Mirror:

As the great artist Michael Jackson once said, “I’m starting with the man in the mirror.”

I’ve run from confrontation.

I’ve reacted poorly when others have brought inevitable issues my way.

I’ve avoided addressing credit card bills.

I’ve waited until tomorrow on tasks needed to be completed today.

I’m as guilty as anyone. 
Here’s the thing….avoiding only makes problems worse.

As we charge into a new year I plan on running toward issues and not avoiding them. I plan on creating an environment of trust, where problems and failures are expected and dealt with immediately. 

Within a short period of time I heard three powerful stories of successful people and organizations that embrace confrontation. 

Do you need to be more proactive in addressing issues in your personal life?

Can you inspire action in others by being empathetic when they face adversity? 

Happy New Year- Let’s run toward the challenges 2021 will present!

Mike 
P.S. I was a guest on Joe Ferraro’s terrific 1% Better Podcast this week. Here are two links:

Audio:

Video