How to Take a Chewing

Do you know a powerful way to standout? Be an All-American at taking a butt chewing.  (Credit to Alabama softball coach, Pat Murphy for the phrase). 
 
There comes a time in every competitive athlete’s life where he or she takes a chewing.  Please pause for a moment and consider a time where you felt the wrath of a coach, boss, or parent.  I’m sure you have a moment you can vividly recall. 
 
The vast majority don’t respond well to this situation.  They pout, shrink away, or talk back.  They use phrases like, “he called me out in front of everyone.”  Selfish pride gets in the way.  Folks often go to great lengths to defend their honor. 
 
Being an All-American at taking a chewing is powerful in several ways.

• It can change your life: Murph said it best, “30 seconds of uncomfortableness can change your life.” If you listen to the message and not the tone, you can use this as a learning opportunity.  The coach/boss/parent is spirited for a reason.  Listen.
• You model toughness: By maintaining your poise, eye contact and body language you are demonstrating toughness under pressure.  Your peers and boss will look up to you.
• Sets a great example: There are accounts of Bill Belichick being relentless on Tom Brady; of Greg Popovich coaching Tim Duncan hard.  Other team members get the message that if the star on the team can take harsh criticism so should I. 

 What do you say after taking a butt chewing?  You maintain eye contact and say “Yes Coach. Period. 
 
Parents:
I strongly encourage you to support the coach or teacher who gives your child tough love.  It’s coming at some point in their life.  Why not learn at a young age how to respond properly to criticism.  All-Americans are consistent.  It doesn’t just happen once. There will be several occasions where your child will wear one.  It won’t break them unless you decide to make it a big deal. 
 
Student-Athletes:
It’s true, most of you will go pro in something other than sports.  A big advantage you’ll have is the ability to accept brutally honest feedback.  In business, there isn’t time to massage the message.  Someday, your boss will tell you your work is crap. You can draw on your experience as an All-American at taking a butt chewing to accept the feedback, make the adjustments, and move on. 
 
Quick Story:
Two years ago we were playing in the biggest game in our program’s history.  We found ourselves down 9-0 after 4 innings and it was a circus.  On one particular play, one of our top players and leaders, failed to back up a base.  There was an over throw and he was just standing in no-mans land.  In between innings I lost it on him.  He looked at me and said, “You are right, Coach.” 
 
What could I say to that?  It diffused the situation completely. 
 
This wasn’t my proudest moment.  My ego was bruised.  We were laying an egg in a big game.  When I saw our player not backing up I lost it. 
 
This story has a happy ending.  That same player hit a home run later in the game.  In addition, we ended up winning 12-10 in extra innings.  More importantly, this former player and I are still very close.  I think the world of him.
 
I know this, we don’t win the game if he pouts, argues or chooses to make a scene in the dugout.  He earned his All-American butt chewing award that day. 
 
Final Thought:
Of course, this discussion is centered around sports and kids.  However, in your line of work can you do a better job of accepting criticism?  Can you model to others in your organization how to take a kicking and keep on ticking? 
 
We are never above a good butt chewing.  Let’s be a positive example for others on how to take criticism.