Are You a Critic or a Performer?

“We have two options: We can be critics or we can be performers.  But, we can’t be both.” – Author and Public Speaker, Michael Port

I used to be a critic.  Of course, I wouldn’t have labeled myself judgmental.  I would have said I was being observant or learning from the mistakes of others.  Really, I was a critic and not a performer.

For years, I wanted to write and share ideas with the world.  I feared what the reaction would be.  “Instead of writing, you should spend more time on your baseball team?”  “Who does this guy think he is?”  “He’s really not that great of a writer.”  I blamed it on the fear of outside critics.  In actuality, I was afraid of the biggest critic, myself.

When I made the choice to become a performer several things happened:

1. I started doing. I wrote.  I made mistakes.  I learned a lot.  I failed.  I succeeded.  Instead of ideas living only in my head, I shared thoughts with the world.
2. I ceased critiquing others. Instead of being in a judgmental state, I watched other performers with appreciation.  Exposing yourself to the world is difficult; I admired those who had the courage to be vulnerable.
3. I lessened the critiquing of myself. I’m still my biggest critic.  I have insecurities, however, I’m much more forgiving now.  There’s a typo (big deal), I stumble during a presentation (it’s happens), I mismanage a situation (I’m human.)
4. I began attracting other performers in my life. Performers will always have critics (more on that in a moment).  However, life’s current has lead me to people who share similar goals and values.
5. I’ve been presented with awesome life experiences. Performing has led me to some incredible experiences that would have never occurred without being “a performer.”

Inner Space vs. Outer Space:

Most people in athletics know the phrase, “controlling the controllable.”  A baseball player, for example, cannot control the results, but he can control his preparation, his thoughts, actions and behaviors.  Athletes get in big trouble when they begin focusing on things that are not in their control: the weather, the coach’s opinions, the fans, the reporters…..the list goes on and on.

As performers, it is critical we focus our attention on our inner space and not our outer space.  For me, I have to trust the process of writing and being authentic.  I’ve learned I am at my best when I write from the heart.  If I focus on what others may like, or not like (outer space), the article is not as powerful.  Once the words are on paper, I have to possess the courage to hit send.  That’s it- I can’t control anything else.

Short Story:

Recently, I had someone tell me another baseball coach was ribbing me for writing.  “He’s telling everyone how to live.  Who does he think he is?”

Hearing those comments really hurt.  I let outer space effect my inner space.  The person’s remarks were my biggest fear; I never want to come off as a “know it all.”  In fact, the reason I began writing was for clarity in my own life.  Hearing the criticism left me dejected.  The comments, coupled with some other struggles, led me to having a conversation with my wife, Lowrie.  In a moment of weakness, I questioned whether to take a break.  As a baseball coach, I have plenty of critics.  Why expose myself to more?  What about our kids?  Is it fair to have them judged more closely because of what I write and do for a living?

It’s amazing how life works.  This past week, two people who I really admire but have never met, reached out to me.  They were impressed I had the courage to share my thoughts.  In fact, they were struggling with some of the same issues and my articles helped bring them some clarity.  These two men were performers, not critics.  They are the type of people I want to be aligned with.  These positive interactions put things in perspective.  It also was a critical reminder that it is impossible to please everyone and critics are a part of life for the performer.

Final Thoughts:

Are you a critic or a performer?  If you are hesitating to pursue something in your heart my guess is you are too critical.  Being critical can prevent you from taking risk because of fear of being judged.

Join me this week in pursuing life as a performer.  While it’s not easy, many of life’s rewards are found on the other side of fear.  When we choose to focus on our inner space, and not our outer space, we are freed to make bolder decisions.

Choosing to live as a performer will increase our critics (for proof, get on a message board of any major college football program).  The world needs critics too.  However, I believe God’s plan for me is to “be in the arena” not sitting on the sidelines.  I encourage you to join me in the game!

Make it a great week,

Mike

Questions for this week:

What are inner space behaviors in your profession?  What are the outer-space behaviors?

Do you find yourself frequently critiquing others?

What is one action you can take this week to become a performer?