Busy ≠ Successful

Life lessons through sports.

3.27.23 | by Coach Mike Deegan

In Tim Ferriss’ book, Tribe of Mentors, one of his studies is Debbie Millman, founder and host of Design Matters. In the book, Tim asks Debbie, “If you could have a gigantic billboard anywhere with anything on it, what would it say and why?” 

Millman’s response: 

“My billboard would say this: ‘Busy is a decision.’ Here’s why: Of the many, many excuses people use to rationalize why they can’t do something the excuse, ‘I am too busy’ is not only the most inauthentic, it is also the laziest. If we say we are too busy, it is shorthand for, “not important enough.” Simply put: You don’t find the time to do something; you make the time to do something.” 

3 things to think about when you say, “I am too busy.”

1. Am I really? 

Where are you spending your time? What does your calendar look like?

When I wake, do I get moving immediately, or do I scroll social media and waste precious time? Am I being intentional with my time, or am I aimlessly going through the motions?

After an honest evaluation, I almost always realize I am not getting the most out of my day. If you are feeling overwhelmed, I highly encourage you to audit your time and priorities.

2. Where can I say “no?” 

One of my biggest flaws is that I have trouble saying a hard no. 

There are times when I just can’t do certain things. Instead of respectfully declining, I’ll often either say yes, or worse yet, put off saying no until a later date. We are all guilty of this.

What does delaying saying “no” do? It invites another conversation at a later date. In other words, it wastes precious time.

People want our time, and they’ll gladly take it if you let them. Beware of the time vampires!

3. Get Clarity

Once we clearly know our mission, we’re more effective. Not only are we clear with where we are going, but we develop the ability to effectively use our time. 

Where do you start? Say no to the things that distract you from achieving your goals. Staying on the hamster wheel of “busyness” prevents us from planning and getting focused. 

Clarity quiets the chaos and frees up more of your time.

Busy Is A Decision | Debbie Millman on Life Priorities

Busy ≠ Successful

For whatever reason, many people like to brag about their busy schedules. It’s as if we think being busy makes us successful. 

Who are the most successful people out there? The ones who have the most time. They are organized, they say no when they need to, and they are clear on their goals & objectives.

Avoid the societal pressure to be “busy.” Don’t fall for the trap. 

Remember, “Busy is a decision.” 

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Get in the arena

Life lessons through sports.

3.20.23 | by Coach Mike Deegan

“We have two options: We can be critics or we can be performers. But, we can’t be both.” 

– Author and Public Speaker, Michael Port 

No one wants to labeled as a critic or judgmental.

But that used to be me. I was a critic.

Of course, I wouldn’t have labeled myself judgmental. I would have said I was being observant or learning from the mistakes of others. Really, I was a critic and not a performer.


Performers focus on the controllable

“Controlling the controllable” is a common expression in the sports world.

When do athletes get themselves into trouble? When they focus on things outside of their control. The weather, the coach’s opinions, the umpire, the reporters, etc. They neglect the variables that are within their control. Their inner space. 

As a performer, focusing on the variables we control isn’t just optional, it’s mandatory. For example, when it comes to writing, I must trust in my process, otherwise what I’m conveying will appear fabricated & inauthentic.

I’m at my best when I write from the heart. If I focus on what others may like, or not like (outer space), the writing is not nearly as powerful.

Once the words are on paper, I have to possess the courage to hit send. That’s it. I can’t control anything else. 


Where to start

Start doing. Start making mistakes. Learn. Fail. Succeed. Share your thoughts publicly with the world. Stop critiquing others. Observe other performers.

The Man in the Arena – Teddy Roosevelt

Ask yourself:

What are inner-space behaviors in your profession? What are the outer-space behaviors? 

Do you find yourself frequently critiquing others? 

What is one action you can take right now to become a performer? 

While it’s not easy, many of life’s rewards are found on the other side of fear. 


Pair this article with:

> Are You a Critic or a Performer?

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Running Your Own Race and Focusing On Your Inner Space

Life lessons through sports.

3.13.23 | by Coach Mike Deegan


Shane Battier vs. Elton Brand: Who did it best?

Shane Battier

  • Played all 4 college seasons
  • #6 pick overall
  • 13-year NBA career, earning $56,569,622
  • Won each an NCAA Championship and NBA Championship

Elton Brand

  • Left after 2 college seasons
  • #1 pick overall
  • 17-year NBA career, earning $169,229,324
  • Never won an NCAA or NBA Championship

Comparison is the thief of joy.

To compare these two stud athletes is ridiculous and silly. They were both incredible basketball players. Oftentimes, we get so caught up in what other people are doing. Why waste the time and energy?

This mindset limits us in many ways, and it robs us of happiness.

How to stop comparing and start competing | Brett Ledbetter | TEDxGatewayArch

How to run your own race

Coach K is a master of educating others on how to run their own race. This is especially helpful in the highly competitive world of college basketball. Here’s how he puts it:

We tell each player that comes in…each of you run your own race, and collectively we run a team race. If Shane Battier was running Elton Brand’s race, he would have been disappointed. Kids come along differently: some faster then stop; some slower then fast; some fast and never stop. Don’t gauge yourself on how someone else is doing. Gauge yourself on how you are doing.


Focus on your inner space

Outer space

Outer space includes those things outside of your control. Playing time, what other say and think of you, friends, family, etc.

Inner space

Inner space includes those things inside of your control. Effort, attitude, work-ethic, coach-ability, etc.

Focusing on the outer space is a fool’s errand. Instead, focus on the inputs that you do control. Your inner space. Shane Battier is a prime example that we can all look up to.


Action Step

What is something right now that has been affecting you negatively or that causes you worry? 

Write down the portion of the issue that’s in your control. Everything is outside of your control.


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Staying neutral out of hand, Jim Valvano’s epic speech, and SF Giants Kai Correa’s interview

Life lessons through sports.

2.27.23 | by Coach Mike Deegan


The Opener

Later in this article, you’ll get to know San Francisco Giants Bench Coach, Kai Correa better. For now, I’d love to share a phrase he taught me: Neutral out of the hand. 

The phrase stems from basketball. When the ball leaves the shooter’s hand, you can often tell if the player thinks it’s going in. They back pedal and hype the crowd up as the ball is still in the air.  They are positive it’s going in.  Sometimes they are right…. but other times, they are wrong.  

How does this relate to leadership?

Coaches, managers, leaders, teachers and CEO’s often assume their message lands with the audience. When asked: How’d the presentation, practice, class or meeting go? They will quickly answer, “Fantastic!” 

Meanwhile, if you were to poll the audience you are likely to get a different response.  

Much like the shooter backpedaling down the court after the shot, the leader assumes their message is on target. Unfortunately, this isn’t always the case.  

How can we guard against this? We stay neutral. Instead of assuming we crushed it, we ask for feedback.  “How did that go?” “What was your key takeaway?” “How did that land with the others?”  

Stay neutral out of the hand.


“The closer we can come to experiencing the work as the audience experiences it, the better position we are to evaluate it.”

– Rick Rubin

The Set-up

In John Feinstein’s new book, “The Legend’s Club” there’s a brilliant story of Jim Valvano’s epic speech at the ESPYs.  I’m sure you’ve seen the video.  Valvano, body riddled with cancerous tumors, implores the audience to: “laugh, cry and think every day.”  

If it’s not the best speech of my lifetime, it’s pretty darn close. 

Jim’s 1993 ESPY Speech

Here’s the behind the scenes story as told by Feinstein.

The audience stood and clapped and cheered and cried as Vitale and Kryszewski helped him down the steps.  He all but collapsed in Kryzsweski’s arms as he reached his seat.  When he sat down, Pam (his wife) leaned over and gave him a kiss.

“Was I okay?” he asked her softly.

“Yes, honey, you were okay.”  

He closed his eyes completely drained, and, with the cheers and applause still ringing in his ears, he passed out.

Neutral out of the hand.


The Closer

This week two people I know and admire sat down for a “Damn Good Conversation” on the 1% Better Podcast.  If there is a better podcast host than Joe Ferraro, I’d be surprised.  His genuine curiosity, preparation, and question asking skills have been on display with guests such as: Seth Godin, Jon Gordon, Mitch Albom, Annie Duke, Steven Covey, and Roy Firestone. 

I think the world of Joe.  His interview with Kai Correa is my new favorite. The term “master coach/teacher” is frequently used but rarely deservingly so. With that being said, Kai is a master.  His ability to communicate complex skills in digestible and vivid ways is second to none.  I met Kai in person for the first time in 2019. After spending time with him I told the people I was with, “That’s a feature MLB manager.” He’s well on his way to making my prediction a reality.  

If you are interested in teaching, preparation, systems for learning, and communication you’ll love this episode (Shoot…that’s not being neutral out of the hand.)


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New beginnings, handling failure, and controlling the controllable

Life lessons through sports.
2.20.23 | by Coach Mike Deegan


The Opener

You look forward to it like a birthday party when you’re a kid.  You think something wonderful is going to happen.”

Joe Dimaggio

Friday marks my 20th opening day as collegiate baseball coach. There’s something special about the opener.  What does it mean to me? 

It’s a fresh beginning layered with hope and aspiration. 

It’s a reminder of how lucky I am to get to do something I love.  

There’s also the uncertainty. Will we ever get a hit? Score a run? Win a game?

There’s the human side – disgruntled players, parents, faculty, and fans. It won’t be all wins and smiles.  

Is it possible to approach your week like “Joltin” Joe on opening day?


The Set-up

The Philadelphia Eagles were so close to being Super Bowl champions. 

A controversial holding call sealed their fate against the Kansas City Chiefs.  The players and coaches’ response after the game showcased the culture and character of the organization.  While most people would blame and complain, they didn’t.  

“I’m never going to be someone who puts blame or anything on officials”. – Jason Kelce

“I’m big on self reflection and considering the things I could have done better.” Jalen Hurts

“It was a hold. So they called it”- James Bradbury

“I know it always appears that it’s one call that (decides the game).  It’s not what it is. Today they were better than we were”- Head Coach Nick Sirianni.

Pros lean into the things they can control: effort, energy, focus, work capacity, diet, and training. Amateurs dwell on things out of their control: weather, referees, field conditions and coaches’ decisions.

Can you improve your approach in times of adversity?


The Closer

In anticipation of opening weekend, here’s our “hype video”.

Put some eye black on, pound your mitt, throw in a wad of big league chew, have a game of catch and go dominate the week.


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2.13.23 | by Coach Mike Deegan

Lessons on Life, Leadership & High Performance

Playing your best players, how to be your best, and James Clear on Tim Ferriss


The Opener

“What should I do? My daughter isn’t getting any minutes for her high school team. Should I talk to her coach?”

This question came from a good friend of mine. As a father of four, I could relate – it’s hard to witness your child going through tough times. 

As a coach for 20 years, however, I can emphatically say the main driver of playing time is this question: Who gives the team the best chance of success? 

It’s not personal.

I wrote a long formed article on this topic which includes one of my favorite stories of all-time.

Check it out here:

George, The Coach is Going to Play His Best Players.


The Set-up

Comedic genius Steve Martin was asked how do you make it in Hollywood. Was it networking? Going to the right events? Working with certain people?  

His answer was simple, yet brilliant: “Be so good they can’t ignore you.”

Watch the video:


The Closer

Denison Baseball alumnus, James Clear, was a recent guest on the Tim Ferriss podcast. I’ve gotten to know James over the years, and I can tell you he’s an even better person than he is an author (with 10 million plus books sold that says a lot).

Ferriss asked James for marketing strategies when launching a book. James led with this:  

“You have to operate with this assumption of let me create more value than I’m going to capture. The thing that drives book sales is creating something that is actually genuinely valuable to people. Create something that is remarkable – it’s worthy of remark.”

The show is long (2 hours +) but packed with nuggets.

Tim Ferriss Show featuring James Clear:

LISTEN HERE

WATCH HERE

Have a great week,

Mike


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The Rule of Thirds:

Have a bad day recently?  If so, consider the rule of thirds. 

Olympian Alexi Pappas was frustrated with her lack of improvement in training.  Her coach gifted this advice: When you’re chasing a dream you’re meant to feel good a third of the time, ok a third of the time, and crappy a third of the time.  As long as you’re in that ratio you’re doing fine.”

My takeaway, love the crappy days- they are a part of the process. 

Best Question of the Week:

Recently, I saw a clip of Amazon founder Jeff Bezos.  He explains that people often ask: “What’s going to change in the next ten years?  The better question, he explains, is: What’s not going to change?  “I submit to you that the second question is actually the more important of the two because you can build a business strategy around what’s stable.”

I challenge you to consider: what’s not going to change in your industry in the next ten years? 

Podcast Recommendation:

A few weeks back Fahd Jindani joined us on the Coaches Clinic podcast.  Fahd currently serves as an Assistant Strength Coach for Vanderbilt football.  My only claim to fame is I know when I see something special.  Fahd is special.  I think you’ll enjoy the show (Parental Discretion is Advised). 

Have a great week.  And, as always, if I can ever help please let me know.

Mike

This summer, Mark Bradley passed away from cancer. Mark possessed a larger than life presence- he had the look of a GQ model plus charisma. 

I met Mark when I was a student-athlete at Marietta College. He participated in the community fall baseball league while climbing the ladder at Peoples Bank. A former Academic All-American at Ohio University, Mark was usually the best player on the field. In addition, he was the color man for the “Etta Express” baseball games. He and his great friend, Johnny Wharf, would travel from Panama City, FL to Appleton, WI calling the games of their beloved home town team. 

When I returned to Marietta to become an assistant baseball coach, Mark had risen to President of Peoples Bank. I always admired Mark and asked him if I could pick his brain about leadership. We had lunch which sparked a 20 year friendship/mentorship. 

For those of you who knew Mark, I hope this is a reminder of how lucky we were to have had him in our lives. For those of you who didn’t, I wanted to pass along his wisdom. 

Speak Greatness into Others

Somewhere around 2009 I shared with Mark an article titled, Toughness, by Jay Bilas. The article defined toughness in basketball. Mark challenged me to write the baseball corollary. I’ll never forget Mark, still in his business suit, on my beat-up front porch going over his edits. It ended up becoming the first article I ever published. 

In 2015, I began sharing this newsletter. I could always count on a response from Mark. Here are examples of his wit, wisdom and encouragement. 

10/31/16 How to Overcome a Slump: “Great writing, Deego. I will be walking taller today. In a work slump, need some hits. As my first college coach Jerry France used to mutter in the dugout ‘double, double, double.’He hated singles and bunts.”

7/17/17 Four Nuggets Learned Leading Camp: “Special stuff, Deevers. You are on a roll.  Every kid is different, just like adults. Some get it, some won’t.”

12/4/17 Look Good, Feel Good, Play Good: “Well written Deego. Going to work out extra hard tomorrow night and add extra hair gel in the morning.”

1/1/18 Attempting to Define Happiness: “I needed a theme for 2018, a rallying cry of sorts….you just nailed it (in Big Red letters):   GOOD”

1/8/18 Sudden Change- Being Your Best Despite of the Circumstances: “Ice storm = GOOD….gives me a chance to be patient behind the wheel, and drive calmly, instead of driving fast and taking chances. GOOD stuff Deego.”

10/15/18 It Takes a Team: “Best ever. Good work Deego. And, you would have been a great financial planner too. But not as much fun……Yeeuuuussss”

6/25/19 Victim or Thriver: We Always Have a Choice: “Deevers- found this in my files today to make sure I was still calibrated with the Allen Love rule of, ‘tell the truth, tell it early.”

11/18/19 How to Take a Butt Chewing: “2 words: Best Ever.”

8/24/20 Whelp, Get a Better Job: “Thanks for hitting SEND. That message needs shared. Just talked to my family yesterday about whining. Whelp, time to get moving and get to work.”

9/8/20 Doing What the Game (and Life) Demands: “Spot on. Brilliant”

1/25/21 Shoot Your Shot: Thoughts on Andy Reid’s Decision: “I remember what one of my long time mentors told me 25 years ago about ‘gut instinct’….actually instantaneous reasoning. Be GOOD.”

1/17/22 Tom Brady, Man in the Arena: “What you wrote is so good. Best ever. Nice work.” (*This was the last one I published before his passing.*)

The world is full of critics. Mark was the opposite of a critic- he was an encourager. He whispered greatness week after week. 

Handling Failure Like a Pro:

We gathered at a friend’s house to meet up with Mark after he stepped down as President of the bank. We were furious. We wanted blood. All of us were customers and we were ready to take our business elsewhere. 

When Mark arrived he was cool as ever. He explained how things go with high-profile positions- it’s part of the territory. He reminded us of the great people who still worked at the bank. He cared deeply about them. It was grace at its finest. 

Headhunters had begun to reach out to him about leadership positions in other cities. He was clear, he and his family were not moving. He was optimistic things would work out.

Mark continued to walk around with his head held high. He didn’t hide. That’s what happens when your job title or status doesn’t define you. Mark was the husband of Tammi, father of Emmie and Gabby, and a friend to many. He was a pillar of the community; his job title had nothing to do with that. 

Circumstances Don’t Dictate Happiness:

In 2009, Mark and Johnny traveled to Texas for our spring trip. Instead of warm weather, we were met with cold, ice and snow. This was also Mark’s vacation; no golfing this year.

I saw Mark and told him I felt bad: “Are you kidding me, Deego? We found this run down barbeque joint. I didn’t think Wharfy was going to make it out alive. It was the best time.” 

While most people whine and complain about circumstances, Mark found the best in any situation. 

Live Like You are Dying

In Tim McGraw’s classic song, Live Like You are Dying,” he references a man who is diagnosed with terminal cancer. The man is asked what do you do when you get the news? 

“I went skydiving, Rocky Mountain climbing, I went two point seconds on a bull named Fu Manchu.  I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter- I gave forgiveness I’ve been denying. I hope someday you get the chance to live like you were dying.” 

So, in the summer of 2021 when Mark learned he had stage 4 liver cancer what did he do?

He worked.

He golfed.

He cherished Tammi and the girls.

He attended Mass.

He enjoyed friends.

He called the ‘Etta Express’ games.

He worked out. 

The most impressive thing I’ve ever witnessed is how Mark handled his diagnosis.

Mark always lived like he was dying. 

Conclusion:

When Mark passed away he was serving as the President of Magnum Magnetics. I received this text from one its founders, Allen Love:

“It’s a void in so many ways. We had him as a friend so he lives on in us! We are all better for having had his friendship. He always left more wood on the pile than he used. He was so confident in his own skin he needed nothing. He was truly interested in everyone around him.  He cared! He would coach people without even knowing.”

Until writing this, I never fully appreciated his impact on me.  Our interactions were never forced, he was just this authentic, awesome person. Mark changed the way I operated. He was coaching without me knowing. 

His favorite article was: Michael’s Home: Unspoken Parenting Advice From My Late Father. The response below is one I’ll always treasure.

“You hit me right with this one Deego. Lost my dad 8 years ago this month. Thought a lot about him in the past week. Still tough. Always will be. Our fathers helped build us into the people we are and will be. Your impact on others is huge. Keep up the good work. 

MB

P.S. thanks for letting me borrow ‘Emmie’s home!’ Which I yell every time Emmie is home from college. Very Special.”

Mike

PS. I apologize for the length of this email. Honestly, I could have written another 1500 words about Mark. In fact, if you are interested send me a note. I’d love to talk more about the lessons Mark delivered. 

Parable of a Chinese Farmer

Is it possible, the tragic event is actually an opportunity? Could a run of good fortune actually lead to something negative?

The answer to both of those questions is “maybe.”

This two minute video from Alan Watts encourages us to stay neutral. Life events happen and we never really know if it is good or bad.

‘You Can Get Past a lot of Things if There’s True Love’

Last week I had the opportunity to sit down with the Daily Coach. I’ve always admired the work of Coach George Raveling, Michael Lombardi and Trevor Kapp.

Here’s a link to the article.

The Peter Attia Drive Podcast

The Science of Happiness: Arthur Brooks PHD

I’m taking a risk with this share. It’s not my typical culture, teamwork, leadership theme.

Most of us are driven toward success but neglect the aspects of life that provide happiness. Brooks and Attia discuss how it’s possible to be both successful AND happy.

This episode is long. And, I found the first 20 minutes kind of blah. Please stick with it- I think you will find the conversation thought provoking.

The Drive Episode Episode #229

I owe an apology.  This is my first article since February, which makes this not much of a “weekly” newsletter.  Like the person who leaves the party without saying “goodbye”, I departed without letting anyone know.  Before I jump back in, it’s necessary to provide an explanation. 

Since we last connected, much has happened (which should be the case after 10 months).  Our baseball program had a strong season, my speaking and consulting business had its best year, and I shared surreal experiences with my family.  I found myself interacting and doing work with amazing people and organizations. If I were to post my highlight reel on social media, many people would be jealous. 

As I enter the second half of my life and career, I find myself in an interesting space.  Years and years of working in the shadows has created opportunities that 25 year old me would have thought were impossible.

I would be lying if I didn’t share how this period has been difficult as well.  There were times, many times, where I wished I didn’t have opportunities and decisions to make.  I also experienced public and personal failure. My previous life was comfortable; I longed for comfort to return. 

A mentor and close friend of mine likes to ask: “when you are happiest and most fulfilled who are you with and what are you doing?” This challenging time created crystal clear clarity.

  1. My family: I feel extremely lucky to have family that I genuinely love to be around.  Their happiness is directly tied to my fulfillment. 
  2. Working with others toward a shared goal: There’s nothing like having a big goal and working tirelessly with people you love.  Coaching provides a platform for this work. 
  3. Doing creative work: I have a love/hate relationship with writing. When I finish a session, I’m typically energized. On the flipside, creating the time and starting the work can be agonizing.  This newsletter is my vessel for doing creative work. 

I’m amazed how frequently tough times are needed.  While we are going through it, we just want it to end.  However, once we are on the other side we realize the struggle was necessary and we are thankful for the experience. 

The highs and, more importantly the lows, of the last 10- months made me realize the things I value most are right in front of me.  Any new opportunity must allow me to prioritize family, perform engaging work, and flex my creativity muscles. Those things are non-negotiables. 

I’m sorry for going radio silent.  Despite being busy and doing interesting things, I realized how writing, sharing and learning is a part of my ethos.  I needed this time to figure it out.  I’m confident this 10-month period will make me better. 

I challenge you to reflect upon the question which has impacted me so greatly: When you are happiest and most fulfilled who are you with and what are you doing? Once the answer appears, fight to operate in those spaces as frequently as possible. 

As far as I know, we only get one shot at life on earth.  Shouldn’t we prioritize doing the things we love with the people we love? 

Mike

P.S. I will return with a new article on January 9th